20190831 Saturday weigh-in

Saturday!  The day when I weigh myself to see whether weight control is happening or is just a figment of my imagination.  All week I have been keeping a food journal and counting calories.  I can truly say that I have no idea what I will weigh.  I never do.  But the calorie counting has been going well.  How did that translate to weight loss this week?

Creeping down, down, down

Success!  I have lost a fraction over two pounds since I last recorded my weight 2 weeks ago.  This means that since I started my new weight control lifestyle in January of 2019, I have lost:

Pounds!!
0

That's 73 less than I used to weigh

…but about 47 more than I want to weigh.  I prefer to look on the positive side.  After all, I have already lost 73, so the next 47 should be easy, right?

Actually, I am finding that it seemed much easier to lose the first half of my excess 120 pounds.  Weight loss was about 3 pounds per week fairly routinely, and I kind of got used to that.  Now it is harder.  Why is that?  Well, part of it is success.  It takes more energy to maintain a body that weighs 325 pounds than it does 251.8 pounds.  So eating the same amount means I probably won’t be losing as much every week.  According to the weight loss calculator on the internet here:

325 pounds – 3337 calories per day to maintain weight

275 pounds – 3026 calories per day to maintain weight

251 pounds – 2876 calories per day to maintain weight

(205 pounds – 2590 calories per day to maintain weight)

For now, my goal weight is 205 pounds.  Then I will assess what to do next.

I have been keeping my calorie intake steady at about 1,850 calories per day, so you can see the problem.  In weekly terms, I need to be in deficit 3,500 calories, over a week, to lose a pound that week.  At first (325 pounds), I was in deficit 10,500 calories per week and was losing three pounds at a time.   Now at 251.8 pounds, eating the same amount of food, I am only in deficit 7,000 calories and so losing only 2 pounds a week; and errors and cheats in my calorie counting (some on purpose, some not) now have a bigger effect.  There is less room for error.  

My feeling is that adding in some daily exercise (e.g. walking for 30 minutes) will help even out those problems.  I have also had some interest in strength training (weight lifting) which is also apparently a high calorie burning activity.  But I am not eager to get started yet, that’s another activity that would take a lot of time and dedication.  

For now, I will stick with my winning system, even if the wins are slightly smaller.  Things are still going my way, not as fast.  Maybe it will be 2020 before I reach my goal.  But I will still reach it.

-The Doctor

20190830 Daily report

The commitment I made to control my body’s weight has two parts.  1. I regulate my food intake, and 2. I weigh myself regularly.  That’s a lot of regularity!  Food intake is regulated first through keeping a food journal where I write down everything I eat.  It is also controlled by learning how to eat less and enjoy it more.  Some people are able to do this through willpower.  I don’t have it, not for long.  The reason I am able to keep doing this is because I changed myself, and how I see the world.  I concsiously decided that being in control of my weight should be and was more important to me than almost anything else.  I moved weight control from #96 on my list of values to #2 or #3.  Almost nothing gets in the way of my weight control lifestyle.  That was a choice.    Thinking through that consequences and living them out make up this blog.

These are Kirkland's bratwursts. Good ones. 280 calories each.

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – ham (90) cheese (100); and bread (160) toasted sandwich (with pickles and mustard).

  • 350 calories

Lunch – 6x pizza slices (100); rice (160)

  • 760 calories 

Dinner – 2x bratwurst (280); wheat wrap piece (55)

  • 615 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1795 calories (limit 1800 + 500 bonus from swimming, total 2300)

Rainmaking

Tomorrow is a weighing day, and I don’t want to overeat.  So, I made sure dinner was extra-satisfying – freshly grilled bratwurst wraps.  Today was a good day for food and exercise.  (I missed posting yesterday – it got late.  I may go back and fill in the food journal entry, though.)  Tomorrow I will weigh myself.  Then it’s a new week!  A new week where I can live out my new values and new weight control lifestyle.  I have plans, but we shall see.

 I was talking about this article Wednesday.  It has some interesting ideas and is called “20 habits skinny people live by”.  I am very interested in what separates thin people from overweight people.  I am and have been an overweight person, and want to be able to be a thin one – as thin as I want, through weight control. 

My current hypothesis is that weight is 90% behavior and how you see the world, and 10% genetics you are stuck with.   I have noticed that thin people tend to be very conscious of their body’s weight, and how much they are eating and have eaten during any day.  They keep track of both.  But thin people see the world differently.  My #1 rule is that thin people are devoted to and obsessed with staying thin.  It is a conscious desire that they work hard on.  I don’t believe any overweight person’s claim that some people are naturally thin.  You’re fooling nobody but yourself.  Thin people who stay thin throughout their lives know the reality – the price – of their choice.

The article has 20 rules, some of them summarized here in my words:

  1. Don’t eat late (after 8PM)
  2. Weigh yourself daily
  3. Eat a boring diet.  Quote: “We’re not suggesting you choose one meal and eat it every day for the rest of your life…”  but yes, that is what they are suggesting! 
  4. Reward yourself every day
  5. Make it a hobby – read articles about weight loss and nutrition, find friends who will talk with you about it and who are interested.
  6. Don’t let yourself get hungry – eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and add snacks as required.
  7. Eliminate extra calories.  (For example, eat the hamburger, not the bun and french fries.  Drink water, not beer.)  
  8. Find satisfying foods.
  9. Take enough sleep.  (If your life is out of control, it is hard to get your weight under control.  And sleepy people are stressed and make impulsive decisions.  Sleepy people also tempted to eat more, at least, I am.)

That’s enough for tonight!  I’m not sure where to begin.  I am really excited because many of these first 9 ideas have also occurred to me and I have written about them on this blog!  It’s excellent that I have been able to figure out the thin person’s mindset.  

Rule #3 is really interesting.  Remember my grandfather’s diet?  He really did eat the same thing every day – the same breakfast every day, the same lunch, and the same dinner.  It’s amazing that it is a conscious strategy of thin people.  Maybe my grandfather wasn’t that unusual?  There is also advice in the article to make sure you don’t get hungry without a meal planned.  If I get hungry and have to browse around for something to eat, I have noticed I am much more likely to feel like I need to eat more.  If I have lunch all planned, cooked, portioned, or otherwise ready, and am looking forward to it, then I stay under control when I get hungry for it.  

Don’t these rules look like what I have been telling you?

-The Doctor

20190828 Daily report

The commitment I made to control my body’s weight has two parts.  1. I regulate my food intake, and 2. I weigh myself every week.  Food intake is regulated first through keeping a food journal where I write down everything I eat.  It is also controlled by learning how to eat less and enjoy it more.  Some people are able to do this through willpower.  I don’t have it, not for long.  The reason I am able to keep doing this is because I changed myself, and how I see the world.  Now I see the world through the eyes of a person who controls his body weight.  How did I do that?  I sacrificed my old self and how I saw the world before.  I sacrificed my future self, who was even more weighty.  

I get the gyro, but sacrifice the french fries.

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – Costco cheese pizza half slice (380); leftover spaghetti (50

  • 430 calories

Lunch – Big Greek Cafe Famous $5 Gyros Wednesday (600)

  • 600 calories 

Dinner – pita bread (230); chicken (200); hummus (100); peas (30); cheese (200)

  • 760 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1870 calories (limit 1800)

Spreading out the splurge days

Twice a week, after swimming, I allow myself extra splurge calories.  Recently I have hardly taken advantage of this opportunity.  However when I was losing 2-3 pounds per week, for the first half of 2019, I did enjoy those extra calories.  Recently my weight loss has been weaker.  Are the two things connected?  I don’t know.  But I am willing to find out.  This week I am keeping to an average of 1850 calories per day.  Let’s see what that does come Saturday. 

Due to my interest in the habits and mindset of people who are thin and stay thin, I have read some interesting things on the internet.  First, there are a lot of excuses out there.  Did you know that people who are thin and stay that way have good genes, or low hormone levels, or a natural ability to stay at a certain weight?  That’s amazing.  And I don’t believe it at all.  Have you ever seen thin people (in their 30s or older) in a restaurant?  They might order a bacon cheeseburger and fries, but they eat about two bites and that’s it.  Some take the rest home and some leave the rest on their plates.  I think they are there for the restaurant experience and not to eat themselves to capacity.  

Watch people who are heavier at a restaurant.  We clean our plates and we are there to get as full as we can.  We are there for a quantity experience.  Food is eaten there and there is nothing left to take home.  (I say we because until recently that was me.)

There are some sensible ideas in this article too.  Getting enough sleep is good for staying thin.  It also implies your life is well regulated, since you aren’t up all hours wasting time or frantically trying to get things done.   It is also common knowledge that thin people pay a lot of attention to staying thin.  Paying attention is very important, as I have discovered.  

Tomorrow I want to talk about this article.  It has several great ideas!  Tonight, I am going to take my own advice and go to bed.  Sleep good!

-The Doctor

20190827 Daily report

Getting your body’s weight control (especially when you have never lost weight before) takes a lot of attention.  Keeping your weight under control (once you are at a weight you like) takes a lot of attention, too.  It is like a hobby that you feel really strongly about and are very interested in.  There are people out there who can pay that kind of attention using willpower.  I am not one of those people.  To lose weight, I had to adopt a new set of values.  It doesn’t mean I give up eating the foods I like, though. 

Chicken, or map of Florida?

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 2x Spanish tortilla (166) wraps (110) with 1tsp mayonnaise (30)

  • 470 calories

Lunch – 2x bratwurst (280); 2x wraps (25); horseradish sauce (10)

  • 620 calories 

Dinner – panko chicken piece (250); 5oz cooked rice (160); 1/4C lima beans (50)

  • 460 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); Snickers ice cream bar (180)

  • 260 calories

Total for the day: 1810 calories (limit 1800 + 500 bonus from swimming, total 2300)

Back to normal, all messed up

When things are going well, I never know before I step on the scale whether I have lost any weight that week.  I am always surprised.  You would think I would know by now.  But there is a danger in assuming your system of weight loss will produce results.  You might get sloppy or careless.  Worse, you might get overconfident.  You might think you have have this weight problem figured out and you are in control!  I do think of this as a weight control system.  That may be overstating things.  

Control may be an illusion.  But some things are real.  Hunger is real.  I know when I am hungry.  If I have my life balanced so that I am hungry for everything I eat, that makes for a lifestyle I enjoy.  I wouldn’t want to be hungry all the time – just when it’s time to eat.  Today, I achieved at least that much.  Mealtimes were 8AM, 12PM, and 5.30PM.  That is fairly standard for me.  I did swim today, which gave me a very good appetite for dinner.  I had enough calories left over to have dessert right after dinner, and I have not eaten since then.    Today felt like a good day.  But I don’t know what will happen when I get on the scale Saturday.

Maybe the uncertainty keeps me sharp and focused.  

-The Doctor

20190826 Daily report

My daily task: regulate my food intake, in order to control my body’s weight.  I regulate food intake largely by writing it all down in a food journal.  Measuring the food is the first level of controlling your weight.  If you know how much you have eaten, and keep track of it every day, you get a picture of your eating habits and calorie intake.  You can use your knowledge of your eating habits to achieve higher levels of control – like carefully and judiciously eliminating calories from your daily intake.  

Why would you do any of this?  Because you have changed yourself into someone who cares a lot about their body’s weight.  It is a lens you see the world through.  You sacrifice to achieve it.

333 calories on the plate. Spanish tortilla!

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 2x kofta kebab wraps with yogurt sauce (300)

  • 600 calories

Lunch – 2x bratwurst wraps (300)

  • 600 calories 

Dinner – 2x Spanish tortilla slices (166); Snickers ice cream bar (180)

  • 520 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1800 calories (limit 1800)

Back to work!

I did a lot of unusual travel over the last week.  It was pretty hard on my digestion and I have taken a few days to recover.  During that time, I stuck to my calorie limits pretty well, but things didn’t feel right.  I wasn’t hungry for the usual foods I like, and I had cravings for things I usually avoid.  Also, my body feels heavy and my digestion feels sluggish.   I was also sleepier than usual.  Last, I didn’t put a lot of effort into what I was thinking about food and weight control.  I didn’t even do any reading!  However, I am starting to feel better and got quite hungry today (though it was 10AM before I was hungry for breakfast).  

My only deep thought today is an observation I’ve made before but has to be repeated.  Don’t let anything or anyone stand in the way of what you know must be done in pursuit of your goal.  That includes yourself; don’t stand in the way of your own weight control.  Your old values will fight to regain their old place at the top of your world.  You can’t let them, though it might be tempting and you may have moments of weakness.  If you keep paying attention and keep your new lifestyle flowing from your new set of values, you will regain your equilibrium eventually.  It may take a few days.  But you can do it.  Just realize that having values means there are things you will give up for them.  

Pick your values and goals well, and then stick to them.  Other parts of your life can still be important (old values), just not as important.  Choose well what you put at the top of your consciousness.

-The Doctor

Weekend off

Everything is fine, but I need more time than usual for family things.  Enjoy the break and concentrate on keeping your balance.  Self knowledge is the key to it all.    

-The Doctor

20190822 Daily report

My daily task – from now until I decide to stop controlling my weight – is to keep a food journal, aka documenting and controlling my food intake.  I also call it regulating my food intke.  To measure it is to control it.  My other job is to weigh myself.  Right now, I am trying to lose weight.  At some point in the future, my job will be to maintain my weight.  Either way, I have to keep track of my weight and regulate my food intake.  Without those two principles weight control isn’t possible.  It is the price of getting thin and staying thin.  

How I face the day - breakfast

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 6 Costco meatballs (276); hummus (70); whole wheat wrap (110)

  • 460 calories

Lunch – Italian sausage sub (450); coleslaw (50)

  • 500 calories 

Dinner – corn chips (200); 8oz beef tenderloin (485)

  • 685 calories

Snacking – Nestle Li’l Drums vanilla cone (110)

  • 110 calories

Total for the day: 1755 calories (limit 1800)

Live out your values

When values conflict, which ones win?  One of my most conscious values is weight control.  That means when it is time to eat, I should go eat, no matter what else is going on.  When that value is in conflict (something important is going on), it produces tension.  I know I should be stubbornly insisting on my values that I have chosen.  It is weak to let other things come first.  

On the other hand, this specific situation was my fault.  I could easily have make sure I had something to eat at the right time.  I have jerky snacks, there are restaurants nearby.  I didn’t do that.  I can only blame myself, and make sure I have thought about what to do next time – be responsible for myself.  

If the conflict is: eat now by myself, or eat later with the family, my answer is: eat when I am supposed to.  I am in serious deficit and have a serious weight problem.  I have chosen to put addressing that problem first in my life.  I can always sit with my family while they eat, later.  I suppose that is a good way to look at my experience – preparation for doing the right thing later.  It does mean doing the wrong thing and getting mad at yourself, though.  

Now I have eaten and I think my body is not going to be too upset or rebel against my weight control regime.  I feel a little like I want to eat more (not hungry, I am not hungry), but it’s not too bad.  I don’t  always eat steak for dinner, even if dinner was at 7.15PM!   That’s almost two hours late.  

I should also think about how to live out these values under stress.  Stress happens and you can learn to embrace the challenges, or go under and lose control for a while.  It wouldn’t be the end of the world.  I have successfully restarted my weight control program before.  But I would rather advance in my self knowledge and be able to grow in responsibility and ability and resilience.  It’s all about improving myself, even the weight control.

How will you improve yourself?

-The Doctor

20190821 Daily report

I keep a food journal every day – every meal, really.  If I didn’t do it every meal (every time I eat), I might forget things.  That’s no way to control your food intake!  And to control your intake, you have to keep track of what you are eating.  I do it by counting calories and writing it all down.  That is part of my mechanism for achieving weight control.  The other part is getting weighed every week.  That happens Saturdays.  Today is for the food journal.  

The Big Greek Cafe is open!

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 1/2 slice Costco pepperoni pizza (355); 8 ounces New Orleans red beans (250); 2 mini kit kat bars (70)

  • 745 calories

Lunch – Big Greek Cafe Famous $5 Gyro (600)

  • 600 calories 

Dinner – pretzels (300); beef jerky (90)

  • 390 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1815 calories (limit 1800)

Abbreviated philosophizing

I had unexpected travel today, so pretzels for dinner and jerky!  I willl have more to say tomorrow.  Sleep well and dream of delicious food!

-The Doctor

20190820 Daily report

Since I became a new person, in January 2019, controlling my body’s weight has become one of the top values in my life.  It has been a transformation, resulting in paying a lot more attention to what I was eating, and how much.  I document and live out my transformation in a daily food journal, which I plan to keep on doing for ever.  

ersatz Cubano with horseradish sauce - 350 calories

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 5 ounces cooked spaghetti (250) and cheese sauce (350)

  • 600 calories

Lunch – toasted ham (90); and cheese (100); sandwich on toasted bread (160) 

  • 350 calories 

Dinner – Costco pepperoni pizza (710); Snickers ice cream bar (180)

  • 890 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); chicken pieces (50)

  • 130 calories

Total for the day: 1970 calories (limit 1800 + 500 bonus from swimming, total 2300)

Getting back into balance

To make this sandwich more cubano-like, I would have to swap out the Muenster cheese for Swiss, add some roasted pork loin, and toast the sandwich in a skillet (instead of the toaster).  That sounds good!  I’ll look into that.  Roasting meat is undesirable in the summer, so this version will have to do for now.  But I have some very good recipes for roasting pork loin.  There’s one I have been looking forward to making again – it’s an Italian recipe where you cook the loin in milk.  Fantastic!  But I don’t think that would work well in a Cubano.  

Yesterday I was tired and sleep deprived.  I worried I was in danger since I wouldn’t have concentration for my weight control.  Last night, though, was good for sleep.  I plan to keep that up today.  And I revived another successful practice – letting myself eat a little more on my swimming day.  My routine burns about 600 calories, and I allow myself to eat an extra 500, but I actually had about 200 extra today.  It feels like a reward, and I respond well to rewards.  That and the extra sleep helps me get back into balance.  

Balance is a state where maintaining my weight control lifestyle takes very little effort.  When in balance, I’m not letting myself get too hungry, I am eating the right amounts of food at the right times; I have foods that I want on-hand and prepared.  My mental state is good, I have plenty of sleep, and I have enough time to devote to my hobby (weight control).  I want to be in balance and stay there.  It is a lot of trouble to get careless, lose control, and have to struggle back.  Plus, it interferes with my weight loss progress.  It took me eight weeks to go from 265 pounds to 254.  I was hoping to do that in four or five weeks.  

Balance is tricky to maintain.  Sometimes you just aren’t going to make it home in time to eat.  Then I get too hungry, and my body doesn’t respond well to getting too hungry – it wants to EAT and I could easily lose control.  To guard against that, I keep snacks with me (jerky) but I often don’t think of it until too late.  There is no balance when you have gotten sleep deprived.  Sometimes that just happens and one day isn’t so bad.  But I will sometimes let myself stay up late for days in a row, and it gets chronic and saps my reserves.  I have also gotten into a bad place where the food I have in the house isn’t desireable to me – if I have gotten lazy and not prepared or cooked anything.  

Balance takes work!  But it is a good place to be, if you can maintain it.  It’s less work to maintain balance than it is to climb out of diet failure.  Strive for your own balance.  How do you define it?

-The Doctor

20190819 Daily report

Controlling your body’s weight is not a 5 minute job (nor a one-and-done!).  It takes serious dedication, like it is a hobby, or even an obsession.  I spend an hour a day maintaining my food journal, planning out meals, shopping, not to mention writing these posts.  That kind of commitment has paid off so far, with 71 pounds lost from my highest weight, back in January.  Back when I was gaining weight, one of the main differences from now was that I was not paying a lot of attention to how much I ate, and not spending any time thinking about it, writing about it, worrying about it.  That’s a sacrifice I have chosen to make: time for weight control.  I do the same thing with my personal finances.  I pay attention to them and try to keep things under control.  

Ready, set, grill!

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – corned beef (250); cabbage, carrot, and potato (100); 1000 Island dressing (30); wrap (90); also a piece of baklava (100)

  • 570 calories

Lunch – 6x pizza slices (100)

  • 600 calories 

Dinner – 8oz New Orleans red beans (250); 5oz cooked rice (160); baguette piece (100); tea cookie (50)

  • 560 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1810 calories (limit 1800)

Careening on the edge?

It’s better than falling off the edge into diet hell.  But I mean that last night, I stayed up late for no good reason (past 1AM), woke up a bit late, had to hustle all day feeling a bit tired, and my food schedule was thrown a off.  That isn’t good.  You should be well rested and ready to tackle your food control lifestyle.  It can’t be something you get to when you aren’t too tired.  It has to be the priority.  There’s a danger, as I have discovered from my own experience, from getting tired while trying to eat less.  

Breakfast was ok, but I wasn’t hungry for lunch on time and didn’t eat until an hour or so later than usual (12.30).  By contrast, I couldn’t stop thinking about dinner after about 3.30PM – my concentration was affected.  I gave in and ate dinner just before 5PM, but then found myself snacking on baguette and a cookie well after dinner (8PM).  You know what I mean.  Sometimes the body has a mind of its own when you are tired and distracted.  I did manage to pay attention, though – the baguette piece and cookie didn’t feel rewarding, since I wasn’t really hungry when I ate them.  Even though the total calories worked out, I see today as a partial failure, since I was out of control and ate after dinner when I wasn’t hungry.  

Tomorrow is a new day to do it right.  I will be going to bed on time tonight!  I plan to be good at my hobby, and successful.

Interestingly, my usual swimming pool is closed for its annual maintenance cycle.  I have to venture elsewhere tomorrow and for the next 2 weeks, so that will be an adventure. 

Be well rested!  Weight control needs your best self.  

-The Doctor

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