20190509 Daily report

The method I use to control my weight is simple and has two parts.  (1) Monitor your weight every week and (2) regulate your food intake.  Part of the regulation is a complete and honest recording of everything I eat (there are a few exceptions).  It’s amazing what has calories and what has more than you’d think.  Anyway, after four solid months of dieting, my clothes have started to not fit in uncomfortable ways.  I had to say goodbye to all my size 52 pants this week.  It was harder than you think, to let go.  It’s part of becoming a new person, after all, and that is always a little scary.  

I'm sure there was a Simpsons episode about this, using blue pants.

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 3 x pizza slices (170)

  • 500 calories

Lunch – The Doctor’s famous ham, roasted Brussels sprout, and horseradish wraps (370)

  • 370 calories

Dinner – Homemade lentil soup (200); breaded baked chicken breast piece (150)

  • 350 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); 42 grams of chocolate (220); three Jaffa cakes (150); Nestle Li’l Drums ice cream cone (110)

  • 560 calories

Total for the day: 1780 calories (limit 1800)

Don't slack off

The Doctor was on Reddit today looking at the Loseit forum (an online weight loss group).  One thing I picked up quickly is that dieters are really dedicated to using their willpower, and are discovering real reserves of willpower in themselves, to force themselves to stay on their diet plans.  The Doctor is impressed with their strength.  There is no way The Doctor would last that long.  That’s why I have invented a new system that makes the weight loss program self reinforcing.  

So how does The Doctor keep motivated and keep dieting?  It’s hard to answer that in the way it is asked.  I am not using willpower to keep on the diet.  Instead, I have totally changed how I look at things, including food. 

In my old life, my goal when eating was to be full and to enjoy whatever comfort or satisfaction came with a full belly.  When I was thinking like that, dieting was almost impossible.  Every time I tried to diet by eating less, I was pushing against my need to be filled.  I had no satisfaction from eating things I didn’t want to eat, and didn’t even have the cheap satisfaction of feeling filled.  In no time, I would start rebelling against my diet and break it.  I wasn’t someone who could lose weight on purpose.  

Now, being thin is at the top of my moral hierarchy.  That might sound shallow, but I have a serious weight problem that needs care and attention.  Obsession is fully justified.)  Now my goal, when eating, is to be hungry when I sit down to eat.  It’s a more refined and powerful eating goal than eating until filled.  I could eat and eat for a long time before feeling full, when that was my goal.  The food tastes so different, and exciting, and fulfilling, when you are really hungry for it and are really looking forward to it.  Focusing on being hungry has several benefits.    

The beauty of focusing on being hungry is that I have to plan to be hungry for my next meal too, and the next, and the next.  So I play a game where I balance eating just enough to last me until my next meal.  Also, it can’t be so little food that I get hungry too early.  Being seriously hungry just in time to eat something really delicious, that I really want, is hugely satisfying.  It’s become a source of fulfillment to have that timing work out for every meal.  

The second benefit of focusing on my hunger regards overeating.  With my new goal of being hungry, I have noticed that only the first portion of food is really fulfilling.  And it really is amazing how good food tastes when you have been looking forward to it for a while and are super hungry also.  Taking a second helping, even of food you love, just doesn’t taste as good and doesn’t feel satisfying.  In consequence, it’s started to feel really distasteful to have a full belly.  It prevents fulfillment of my eating goal.

Embrace hunger!  It does have its downsides, though. I’ll talk about that later.  

-The Doctor

20190508 Daily report

Every day, I monitor my food intake and write the results in my online food journal.  I have been keeping the journal since January 1, 2019.  I plan to keep a journal documenting my food intake for the rest of my life, or, as long as I plan to stay in control of my weight.  After all, I am in the middle of losing 120 pounds.  Gaining it back again would be terrible.  That’s a problem many people have with losing weight.  Once they have gotten their weight down, they stop paying attention and drift back into their old lives that made them overweight.  And the same thing happens all over again.  No thanks.  Keeping a food journal seems like a small price to pay, to maintain all that success.  

Anyway, it’s Wednesday.  What is there to look forward to about Wednesdays?  

$5 gryo Wednesdays at Big Greek Cafe! I look forward to Wednesdays more than anyone I know.

My daily food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 2 x bratwurst wraps (290)

  • 580 calories

Lunch – BGC gyros (600)

  • 600 calories

Dinner – Homemade vegetable curry and rice (600)

  • 600 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1860 calories (limit 1800)

Weight control ideas from others

I may have gone a bit over today, calorie wise.  The important thing is to be honest about it.  I’m not sure why, but I was hungry when I got up, hungry before lunch (like 10AM), and then hungry for dinner at 4PM.  Maybe my exercise yesterday was more vigorous than I thought.

Today, I am reading an interesting article by a woman who lost 100 pounds and (last she wrote) had kept off the weight for 3 years.  She tried to do in one long post what I am trying to write a whole website about, but she has some fabulous ideas.  And she lost 100 pounds, so is worth listening to.  She also has a whole section about the challenges of keeping the weight off.

Alicia had been on several diets and successfully lost weight, but always gained it back.  She was determined to figure out how to keep the weight off and try again.  Her essay has several sections:

  1. Prepare yourself mentally
  2. Set a healthy goal
  3. Set a calorie limit 
  4. Count your calories
  5. Exercise
  6. Troubleshooting
  7. Maintenance

Some of her points are golden.  For #1, she talks about the need to change yourself, and calls for total honesty with yourself.  The Doctor approves.  Your life must change, you have to re-order the values you live by and adopt a new moral hierarchy.  If you are not honest about what is wrong about your old life, you are denying the need to change.  Success will be harder to achieve.  

Point #2 is also important.  She suggests using the middle of the BMI range as the target for your healthy weight.  She points out you can always change it later, if that doesn’t suit you.  That’s great advice.  The question of what weight I am aiming for has been a puzzle to me.  I half jokingly suggested my goal was to fit into size 38 pants.  Knowing from her point #1, with honesty, where you are, and from #2 a clear goal where you are going, orients you in the direction you want.

#3 and #4 are related.  The Doctor’s calorie limit is about 1800 per day, though I will have more if I have exercised or if I really, really want to.  Alicia is a lady, so her calorie limit is about 1200 per day.  Women tend to have a lower burn rate then men.  Even so, 1200 per day sounds pretty rigorous.  The Doctor would have to be on 1500 calories per day to match her in proportion.  She also makes the excellent point that the food you eat can be anything, so long as you are honest about the calories involved.  Want an 1100-calorie burrito?  No problem, get it, but cut it in half.  Eat the other half tomorrow.  Alicia also talks about finding foods that keep her satisfied for long periods.  That’s important self knowledge.  

Regarding exercise (#5), The Doctor doesn’t have much to say.  Alicia is quite active and runs marathons.  The Doctor knows that kind of thing isn’t necessary to lose weight, but there are a lot of people who find the activity challenging and get meaning out of making themselves do it.

#6 Troubleshooting is filled with valuable tips.  The Doctor may come back to this section again someday. 
Briefly, you should eat foods you enjoy, be honest about what you are eating, not punish yourself for having a bad diet day, save up calories to spend on the holidays.  She also has tips for plateaus (where weight loss seems to halt for a time.)  

The Doctor agrees with all this.  Go Alicia!  I hope she is having success keeping the weight off, too.  I would like to discuss her maintenance tips some other time.

-The Doctor

20190507 Daily report

My goal for eating is to become hungry right at mealtimes.  That actually works, about 80% of the time.  Maybe 90%.  Breakfast is the meal that is trickiest to control.  Sometimes I am really hungry for it when I get up, and sometimes it’s an hour until my stomach wakes up.  And sometimes, strangely, I feel kind of hungry when I go to bed, but when I wake up hours later, I am not hungry at all for an hour.  There’s also the opposite problem, when I get hungry before mealtime.  It happened today – I was really looking forward to lunch at 11.00, though lunchtime is 11.30.  I was able to wait until 11.30 by putting a pizza in the oven at 11 – and then anticipating it.  By 11.30 it was ready to eat, and I was very hungry and full of anticipation.  

Worth waiting for?

My daily food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – Aldi mini apple pie (210); bratwurst wrap (290)

  • 500 calories

Lunch – 3 x Rising crust pizza slices (170)

  • 500 calories

Post swim snack – 1/2 piece homemade Tres Leches cake (300)

  • 300 calories

Dinner – homemade sausage chili and noodles (400).

  • 400 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); french toast (100); beef jerky (90)

  • 270 calories

Total for the day: 1970 calories (limit 1800 + 500 bonus from swimming, total 2300)

Listening to yourself

It’s important to accept the idea that there are different parts of you and they might be trying to tell you things.  If only we were willing to listen.  Last week I wasn’t able to swim on Friday – pool was closed unexpectedly.  I could have swum Monday, and had a wide open schedule.  But I kept finding reasons not to go.  Basically, I tortured myself for a good part of the day trying to make myself go swim.  Some part of me was resisting and resisting, so finally I gave in around 2PM.  Today, it was no problem.  I picked a time and went, and had a nice swim.  

So what was the part of me that was trying to make myself swim Monday?  A psychologist would call it my will.  “I will go swim, I order myself to do it!” 

“Perhaps later,” said some other part of me. 

Well, what was that part of me, saying no?  I haven’t given my hypothetical different parts names.  But it’s a part of me that can veto my will.  (Have you ever tried to force yourself to diet?  And found yourself breaking the diet some time later?  How can that happen?)  The trap there is to fall into the idea that you are weak and don’t have willpower.  But very few people can force themselves to do things they really don’t want to do, not for long.  And then you might get really disappointed in yourself, or angry and frustrated, and lose trust in yourself.  That’s not a fulfilling or meaningful way to live.  We must aim higher.   

The point of my system of weight control is that life is better this way.  It is not better because I am thinner.  Thin people aren’t better people.  Life is better because I am listening to myself and respecting these inner voices.  What are they telling me?  Figuring it out can be quite meaningful and interesting.  You are working to understand yourself.  That is respect for your own being.  I have found a way for every part of my body, mind, and spirit to work together.  It’s amazingly powerful.  

Disappointment, frustration, lack of trust in your own self – the opposite of meaning, fulfillment.  Don’t spend one more minute in that world.  Read my posts on how to start a diet and find more meaning in your life, and love and appreciation for your self.  I wouldn’t be doing this (and couldn’t be successful at it) any other way.  

-The Doctor

20190506 Daily report

I am a person who has been able to lose 49 pounds, at last count.  I didn’t used to be that person.  The man I used to be ate his way to 325 pounds, with no end in sight.  That man didn’t value being thin very highly, and didn’t value weight control hardly at all.  Looking back, this is an important reason why my attempts at dieting failed.  For that person, losing weight was a temporary condition dependent on willpower.  I clearly don’t have the kind of willpower needed to diet.  I have never successfully dieted before.  As for dieting unsuccessfully, I am something of an expert.  

Now, I am a different person.  I have been remade, and weight control is near the top of my list of values.  I have given up on low quality reasons for eating food, and am enjoying my life more than ever before.  

Two of these make for a high quality experience! All five is actually low quality.

My daily food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 2 x BLT wraps (200)

  • 400 calories

Lunch – 2 x bratwurst wraps (290)

  • 580 calories

Dinner – Homemade vegetable curry and rice (450)

  • 450 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); pretzels (120); Nestle Li’l Drums chocolate ice cream cone (120)

  • 320 calories

Total for the day: 1750 calories (limit 1800)

How the same food can be high and low quality

I have been hitting hard the theme of weight control and its two parts: (1) monitor your weight and (2) regulate your food intake.  But if it were only so easy, everyone would be in control of their weight.  

Above, I mentioned the idea that I was living a better life now, while controlling my weight; than before, when I was eating whatever I felt like.  That’s partly because my food goals went from low quality to high quality.  There’s more fulfillment and satisfaction from a high quality experience, at least if you are starting from a low enough place.  My previous goal when eating was to eat until completely full, even stuffed full.  I convinced myself over many years that being full was an important goal.  I looked forward to it, planned for it.  Losing weight was a real deprivation, since being full was my only souce of satisfaction.

After much consideration, I decided the goal was wrong.  My eating goal now is to be hungry just in time for my next meal – seriously hungry.  That means I can’t overeat at any meal, or else I have two problems.  First problem, I won’t be truly hungry for my next meal.  Second, the food just won’t taste as rewarding.  Food tastes more appealing and is a more rewarding experience if you are hungry for it.  That’s why I am enjoying life more now – I get more sensual satisfaction from eating than I did before, even though I am in calorie deficit!  

The food I eat now is the same as when I was gaining weight, but I look at it differently now.  Now, my goal is to be really hungry for it and I reward myself with that food – but not too much of it.  That’s why I can eat two of the sausages above and still be appropriately hungry at dinner time.  If I eat all five, I won’t be truly hungry later.  An interesting effect of this change I have made to my thinking is that now being full feels a little distasteful now.  That helps keep me on the weight control plan, and is a benefit I hadn’t planned on when I started this.  Hooray!

-The Doctor

20190505 Daily report

I keep a food journal and monitor my food intake every day.  It’s a habit I intend to keep for the rest of my life.  That’s what people do who are in control of their body’s weight.  If they can do it, I can do it.  

A gray and rainy day today, calls for suitable comfort food.  Homemade lentil soup, with a baguette and cheese sandwich.  

My daily food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – Meatball and hummus wraps (500); pizza slice (100)

  • 600 calories

Lunch – Sloppy joe sandwich (360); Jaffa cake (50)

  • 410 calories

Dinner – Pretzels (100); Homemade lentil soup with baguette and cheese (500)

  • 600 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); 33 grams of chocolate (175)

  • 255 calories

Total for the day: 1865 calories (limit 1800)

Over my limit today

Honesty is essential in my food journal.  If I don’t know what I’m eating, I am not in control.  I might start lying to myself, and lose touch with reality.  It’s always a danger.  Usually, I try to keep 50 calories under my limit, just to account for any forgetfulness, willing or unwilling.  Today, I was over my limit.  I find am often tempted to do that after a Saturday weigh-in that has more emotional impact.  This Saturday was a big step for several reasons.  

First, I have never dieted my way below 280 before.  I have never consciously, while on a diet, lost this much weight, ever.  So that’s a milestone.  It also suggests that my system of weight control, and remaking myself into a person capable of losing weight, might work.  Third, I have been a bit ill for the last couple of weeks (intestinal, don’t ask), and I wasn’t sure what my weight would be when I stepped onto the scale Saturday.  All that in combination was an emotional climax.  When that kind of storm comes through, I noticed I often over eat.  Maybe I should think about why that is.  

I have finished my post on how to start a diet (part III).  No more deep thoughts tonight!  I will come back tomorrow full of ideas.  Until then, good night.

-The Doctor

How to start a diet 120 pounds overweight, Part 3

Review

In Part I of this series on how to start a diet when 120 pounds overweight, I described the philosophy for a new system of successful weight control based on self knowledge, negotiation, and fulfillment. 

  1. Make the decision (to sacrifice your old self)
  2. Accept the realization (thin people monitor and control their weight)
  3. Create a plan (monitor your weight, and control your food intake.)
  4. Learn about yourself (negotiate to find what you really want, keep yourself satisfied)

In Part II of this series on how to start a diet when 120 pounds overweight, I explained how to transform yourself and be reborn as a new person with weight control as a top-level value. 

  1. Don’t go on a diet – sacrifice your old self instead
  2. Change your mind and your body will follow (the other way around doesn’t work)
  3. Avoid the willpower trap – your new life must be worth living (not maintained by force)
  4. The new you – what do you value, and how does that make you different than before?

In Part III of this series on how to start a diet when 120 pounds overweight, we will focus on paying attention – learning how to pay attention to what your body is telling you, and negotiating with yourself to find the way forward.  You must align the different levels of your being so that being in control of your weight makes your life rewarding and meaningful.  More than the old life did! 

Paying Attention

If you have read this far, you have already decided to let go of your old self and embrace a new self.  The new you is committed to a lifestyle where you truly value being in control of your body’s weight.  That value outranks most of your other aims in life.  You will sacrifice your old future in favor of the new future.  You will become a person capable of losing weight successfully and keeping it off. 

The Eye of Horus – A god represented by the open eye. That's paying attention!

The new you accepts that the price of lifetime weight control is a lifetime of paying attention.*  All thin people monitor their weight; all thin people control how much they eat, one way or another.  You are no different.  You are proud of your new life and take pride in controlling your food intake and weight.  You are working body and mind together to increase the fulfillment you get from life.  The struggle to stay in control of yourself gives meaning to your existence.  Success here will make you powerful.  You can apply what you learn to other parts of your life. 

*Don’t fall into the willpower trap.  You’re not meant to be on a diet for the rest of your life, using willpower to keep eating things you don’t want.  The effort is to keep paying attention to your body and mind and keep them working together.  Don’t slack off. 

A new hierarchy of values

Here is what a new hierarchy of value might look like, and how it will play out in your life:

  • Your new value is to be in control of your body’s weight.  It outranks most everything else. 
  • Your new aim is to monitor your weight every week and control your food intake.
  • Your new goal is to be hungry in time for every meal**. 
  • Your new lifestyle should increase your sense of fulfillment and overall satisfaction with life. 

**Note that this goal does not include being hungry between meals.  Nobody wants to live like that.

When you have made these changes, you will start to feel that your old goals for food and eating were not truly fulfilling, but shallow, and left you feeling unhappy.  Fulfilling the old goals came with a mix of immediate cheap satisfaction but also shame (to be enjoyed later).  It’s amazing for me to look back and imagine the way I used to think and be.  Figuring out this lifestyle change has made me much more satisfied with my life and happy with myself.  I can trust and love myself again, after many diet and weight failures over the years.  I recognize that I had become unhappy with myself and a bit depressed about my future.  Now, that has turned around. 

Track your food intake daily (and your weight)

Now, pay attention.  What follows all flows from the decision to let go of all your old baggage and construct a new set of values and goals for yourself.  For your new self, controlling your weight is one of your highest values that you live by.  You make all your decisions through that lens.  It’s a lifelong hobby and you have decided it is so important that you will not let anything get in the way.  No excuses.  It’s not willpower, it’s just who you are now. 

To pay attention is to be in control

There are two MUSTs to be in control of your weight: (1) monitor your weight and (2) regulate your food intake.  After all, if you don’t know what you had for lunch and breakfast, you will have a hard time figuring out how much food you can have for dinner.  If you don’t know, how can you control it? 

Other people address the problem of controlling intake by restricting what foods they can eat.  Keto diet is a very trendy example (on the keto plan, you only eat meat and fat and certain vegetables, very little sugar), but there are others.  Atkins.  South Beach.  Weight Watchers.  But it’s all just regulation of food intake in various disguises.  On those kinds of diets, I found I needed portion control on top of restricting the kinds of foods I was allowed to eat.  I found the restrictions unfulfilling.  I wasn’t proud of telling people I was on South Beach or Keto, either.  I wanted a life more fulfilling than that, and found it. 

Set a day and time to weigh yourself, and maintain a written record of the results (at least once per week).  To regulate your food intake, keep records of every food you ate and how many calories you ate.  This is known as a food journal.  There are workable alternatives: my grandfather solved the problem of monitoring intake by eating the identical amounts of the same things for practically every meal.  He didn’t record anything, but he did weigh himself every day.  He never exceeded 135 pounds and lived to be 101 years old.  That solution didn’t work for me.  It sure worked for him. 

A journal also has a space for your weekly weighing, exercise (if you do that), calculations, and comments – kind of notes to yourself on how you were feeling and how things worked out for you.  The comments are valuable.  Treat your insights about yourself like gold.

Find out what rewards and satisfies you

If you try, you can force yourself to believe that you like eating rice cakes and wilted greens.  It’s probably not true, though.  That’s your WILL talking.  You WILL get on a diet and lose weight!  You WILL eat what I say!  That kind of will.  It has its uses.  But when you are living a lifestyle of controlling your food intake and your weight, you can’t force yourself to do it by willpower, not for long.  You may have experienced this already.  Your body and mind will rebel against the tyrannical will, and you will break your diet and then you will hate yourself.  That’s the different parts of you not acting together.  And hating yourself is no way to get your body’s cooperation.  You need all of the parts of your mind and body working together to do this.  Try it – it is very rewarding. 

Once you have an accurate record of your eating habits for several weeks, you can start finding out things about yourself.  What are you eating and why?  When are you eating?  What foods were you really looking forward to?   What wasn’t satisfying?  When did you need to snack?  Did you binge?  If so, when and why?  That is all very valuable information about yourself. 

Looking back through my food journal entries for breakfasts, I quickly zeroed in on various forms of bacon, sausage, eggs, and steel cut oats as my favorites.  I did eat other things too, but these were the most satisfying to me and kept me happy until lunchtime.  (There were variations, like breakfast sandwiches, BLT sandwich wraps, egg fritattas and tortillas, on top of plain bacon and omelets.)  I am most interested in controlling my weight and being satisfied.  On that score, I am happy to report that I always look forward to breakfast, even under calorie limitations.  Bacon is only 70 calories per slice, and eggs are 80 calories each.  Breakfast of three eggs and three slices of bacon is totally ok and 450 calories.  You will lose weight on three of those meals a day and enjoy the total satisfaction of eating them.  Maybe you will like different foods.  But remember the idea is that you look forward to your meals and they must satisfy you until it is time for the next one. 

Hunger can be your friend

Eating to be full – that comfortable and enjoyable sensation – is a low-quality goal that I embraced for many years. 

What is a higher quality goal?  My higher food goals are to make sure I will be hungry for and excited about my next meal; and to pay attention to every bite I am eating and enjoy it.  That means I have a reason to stop eating when I reach the end of the portion I have decided on.  Amazingly, if you are paying attention and listen to what your body is telling you, you don’t actually get much taste enjoyment out of a second portion of even your favorite food, if the first portion was at all sufficient.  The only enjoyment from eating more and more comes from feeling full, and possibly the sense of completion that comes from finishing the entire dish.  That’s not a high goal!  Your body is trying to tell you, if only you would pay attention, how it wants to be fed.  You can use that. 

Hunger is the best pickle.  -Benjamin Franklin.

What was Franklin saying?  Do you see it?  He is saying that your food tastes best and is most satisfying and fulfilling when you are hungry for it.  If you regularly overeat to feel comfortable and full, there are two consequences: you will not be truly hungry for the next meal, and it won’t taste nearly as good. 

On the other hand, it is not a higher goal to starve yourself, either.  That is very demoralizing and self-defeating.  You should eat sufficient and measured amounts of foods you are really looking forward to.  If you get a chance, read Mark Twain’s story “At the Appetite-Cure”.  Twain knew that hunger was the best pickle!  In the story, after Twain finally lets go of some bad thinking and embraces hunger, he is rewarded with steak, potatoes, bread, and coffee, rather than tripe and old boots!  And he enjoys them and appreciates them more than he ever has. 

The higher goal has the two necessary parts: you must be looking forward to what you will be eating with great anticipation – for that reason, you must be hungry for it.  It makes it taste so much better and it is worth sacrificing and waiting for.  You are sacrificing the feeling (your old goal) of feeling full!  Once you have taken the first bite, the temptation to rush through and get another portion will be there.  Therefore you must temper your instinct and instead eat slowly, enjoying every bite with the knowledge that you will not want any more – it just won’t ever taste as good as when you were hungry.  It will be a waste.  Put the rest away to enjoy it later.  If you make sacrifices (get hungry) and they are constantly wasted (on food you don’t really want), you will not make sacrifices anymore.  This is part of the negotiation you will have to have with yourself.  How do you reward yourself for stopping with one portion?  The reward is that you know the next meal will be worth the sacrifice, too.  You may have to have trust-building exercises with yourself! 

Notice that the goal is not “I want to be thin.”  That is not enough and it is never enough.  If wanting to be thin made people thin, we wouldn’t be struggling to get there.  We are working to transform your values and how you see food.  We are increasing your enjoyment, not decreasing it, and refining your tastes and goals.  You are giving up something (the low quality goal), but you are gaining back much more.  As a side effect of your mental revolution, you will become thin over time.  Isn’t that a nice way for dieting to work?

This is why diet food is such a bad idea, in my opinion.  Who would look forward to it?  Is it worth sacrificing for?  Will you really enjoy it?  No!  That’s completely self-defeating.  All foods can be part of my diet, as long as I am hungry for them and maintain my enjoyment as a means of portion control. 

Plan out your food and have it ready

Make sure the foods you want are in the house and ready to eat.  That means planning ahead.  I like bratwursts by Johnsonville, so I cook them ahead of time with onions and keep them in the fridge.  I can have them ready for lunch in minutes.  Wednesdays I go to a Greek restaurant and have a gyros sandwich of 600 calories.  The point is: have a plan and keep the food you want close to hand.  Once you are hungry, you will want food NOW.  You won’t have time to go to the store or order something.  I know I will get hungry for lunch at 11.30.  I plan the day around the times I will be hungry.  Obsessive?  A bit.  But my weight is coming under control.  That’s a trade-off I can accept.

You have to have snacks ready, too.  Sometimes you will get hungry between meals (or get delayed, lose track of time, and so on) and will need to satisfy yourself immediately.  I am really bad about snacking.  I forget to take snacks with me, and if I do remember, I put off eating them.  It’s an area I will have to work on more.  That’s a downside of embracing hunger as the goal – it’s really hard to ignore once it happens.  Having sacrificed satisfaction through being full, you need to keep yourself satisfied using the high quality approach, so pay attention to your hunger all the time.  Obsessive?  A bit.  But my weight is coming under control.  That’s a trade-off I can accept.

Find the right people to support you

Surround yourself with supportive people.  This may or may not include your parents, spouse, or your best friends.  Pay attention to who supports you during your efforts.  You have a goal: find a higher purpose and meaning in your life and then live out the consequences through your lifestyle choices.  Some people you think are friends, might be unsupportive, even destructive, if you announce you are improving yourself.  Maybe it makes them jealous or they feel ashamed of their own shortcomings, who knows?  You can’t change your lifestyle successfully with those people in your life.  They might find ways to sabotage you and take a perverse pleasure in keeping you low, in your failures, bad days, and other shortcomings. 

This negativity can take various forms.  The person might just act uninterested, which is a signal for you to stop talking about your transformation and successes and find someone else to talk to.  A more negative approach might be to start putting you down or saying negative things, or dismissing your accomplishments.  Even well-meaning people can say things that you don’t find helpful.  My mother sometimes said things I found irritating – but she is trying to be supportive.  I have asked her to say different things instead, which she is willing to do. 

If you have unsupportive, jealous, negative, or plain toxic people in your life, try talking to them about the weather instead.  Avoid the subject of your diet success and new lifestyle and don’t bring that up to them.  Find people who will encourage you and be happy for you that you are accomplishing your goals.  Keep your vision high.  Find meaning in pursuing your goal through your choices and new values. 

Don’t let anyone hold you back, not even family.  Get some people who are happy for you and want you to succeed.  They are around if you look, and they are worth the finding. 

-The Doctor

20190504 Saturday weigh-in

It’s Saturday!  Saturday is the day I have set aside for my weight monitoring.  There are two parts to controlling your weight: (1) monitor your weight and (2) regulate your food intake.  Some people do like to weight themselves every day.  My grandfather did.  For me, once a week is enough. 

It’s been a troublesome few weeks.  I haven’t been feeling well and my weight was up and down.  But I am feeling much better now.  Things are back to normal.  Last week, I weighed 278.8 pounds (though that was a bit complicated).  So when I stepped on the scale this morning…

I like when the number goes down

That’s an improvement over last week!  So for all my worrying, I was still moving in the right direction.  I have had more drastic weeks of weight loss, but this means since beginning my new lifestyle I have lost:

Pounds!!!
0

That’s a big difference.  I still have a long way to go, but steady progress is good.  It means that my system of weight control is working.  Remember, I don’t consider myself on a diet.  I have made changes to my life and rearranged my hierarchy of values, and my goal is weight control, not weight loss.  I don’t know exactly what my stopping point will be, but according to the US Army, which knows something about physical fitness, there is a range.  Their range for men my height is 148-214 pounds.  Where will I fall?  I have no idea yet, but 205 is a good guess.  

This brings us to the issue of pants size and clothing fit, as I lose weight.  Friendly observers (Mom) have told me that my clothes are starting to look inappropriately loose and baggy.  It took a long time, though.  The size 52 pants I was wearing must have been at their upper limit.  I tried some size 50 pants I had in storage, with mixed results.  Those with stretchy comfort panels fit.  Ordinary pants (no stretch panels) did fit, but showed body contours under the fabric.  So I am staying out of those.  But in my closet I have pants all the way back down to 46, for when I need them.  I also have some shirts in storage that used to fit.  Maybe they do, now.  

How will I fit into clothes as I shrink from now on?  Losing 120 pounds in one year, you would expect I won’t fit anything for very long.  It took me losing almost 50 pounds to go from size 52 to 50.  But during the next 70 pounds, I will probably drop a few sizes.  There is also in my mind the idea that after I shift to weight maintenance, my body will keep changing for a while anyway.  120 pounds is a drastic amount to lose.  It might be another year before all the changes work out of my system.  

Anyway, that’s fine as fantasy.  The reality is, I still have 71 pounds to go.  When I get half way (60 pounds lost, 60 to go) I will have to think of a special reward.  Hmmmmm.

-The Doctor

20190503 Daily report

“The pool is closed through Monday for a swim meet.”  That’s what I saw today.  I am lucky I have a safeguard built into my calorie regulation system.  I knew I would be swimming today, I knew I could eat 500 extra calories.  But I didn’t eat them yet, because the rule is I can’t bank those extra calories until I’ve earned them.  I can’t eat 500 extra calories just “because I’m going to swim later.”  Once I have swum, and if I am hungry, I can eat 500 calories more.  Today, unexpectedly, no swimming – but no harm done.  I still get to eat pizza for dinner! 

If you look at the inner 7 pepperonis, you might smile.

My daily food intake and calorie count:

Breakfast – Costco pizza slice (350) 

  • 350 calories

Lunch – 2 x Homemade chicken enchiladas (250)

  • 500 calories

Dinner – 5 x pizza slices (100), pretzels (150)

  • 650 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); 2 x Jaffa cakes (50); Lil Drums ice cream cone (110)

  • 290 calories

Total for the day: 1790 calories (limit 1800)

Every day, I concentrate on regulating my food intake for that day.  My goal is to get hungry just in time for each meal.  Part of the job is to make sure that I have something worth eating once I am hungry, since it’s going to be a small portion.  Then, I take my time and enjoy eating it.  As I eat my food during the day, I enter it into my food journal.  Then, my food intake is under control. 

I was talking to someone yesterday who said it seemed like my system (weight control) was easy for me.  That couldn’t be more wrong.  It’s not easy for me!  I am trying to make it easier for you.  I feel like what I am doing is hard, since I am inventing it as I go along.  Maybe, somewhere, someone else has come up with a similar system, but reading around the internet, I haven’t found it yet.  Some of the techniques and advice is similar (see yesterday’s post), but the underlying thinking and accumulation of self knowledge are areas I haven’t seen explored carefully.  

Thinking is key.  You got to be overweight using your old thinking and habits and life.  You have to be willing to let all that go and adopt some new ideas before you can be in control of your weight.  But you can do it.  You can value things that keep your weight under control and learn to devalue things that keep you from that.  You can find within yourself the strength to do this, if not for yourself, then for all the people that depend on you.  

A support system is also nice.  There are people in my life I don’t share my weight loss achievements with, and don’t discuss my new values and thinking with.  I don’t believe those people would be happy for me or help me.  Better not to involve them.  There are other people in my life who are happy I am getting my weight under control.  I tell them all about it and they tell me I am doing a good job.  

Self knowledge is also important.  If anything helps keep the weight off, it’s knowing all about how to control your intake and the months of experience you will have doing that.  That’s why you can’t make temporary changes and go back to your old life once you have lost some weight.  Your old life made you overweight, and will again.  It has to go.  Your new self knowledge makes you strong and independent and in control.

-The Doctor 

20190502 Daily report

I am having a strange week, food wise.  This morning, I was very hungry.  I thought this was due to my low calorie day yesterday, so I didn’t worry about it.  I had a nice breakfast.  Then I wasn’t hungry for lunch, until an hour late.  Then I was Really hungry!  So I ate almost all the rest of my calories for the day, for lunch.  I wasn’t hungry for dinner, so I thought it all worked out.  Wrong!  By 9PM I was hungry again, and am now way over for today.  If you average yesterday and today, it works out…..

It's amazing how good these are. What is it with Belgian chocolate??

My daily food intake and calorie count:

Breakfast – 6 x pyrohi with butter (75 + butter)  

  • 600 calories

Lunch – Costco pizza slice (350); chicken and hummus wraps (350)

  • 700 calories

Dinner – noodles (75)

  • 75 calories

Snacking – 35 grams of chocolate (175); 3 x chocolate hazelnut coins (55); tea with half and half (80)

  • 425 calories

9PM meal – sloppy joe sandwich (300); pretzels and hummus (100)

  • 400 calories

Total for the day: 2200 calories (limit 1800)

Weight loss review

I’ve been reading some of the many, many websites dedicated to losing weight.  Most interesting to me right now are those which describe ideas from someone who has lost a lot of weight.  I am having fun fitting their ideas into the Doctor of Things weight control framework.  This is so I can see if there are agreements and any contradictions.  Always listen to people who have lost the weight already, right?

The article I am reviewing right now – click here.

This article has weight loss tips from twelve people who lost weight successfully, most of them lost 100+ pounds.  What follows is my summary of the advice they would give to other people.

Sarah – devote a lot of time to weight loss.

David – make sure you have your desired foods and snacks ready to go

Julie – monitor your weight by any method that works

Megan – create new values to live by

Jessica – Focus on today and this week

Olivia – create new values to live by

Kate – create new values to live by (the article wrongly calls this motivation)

Haley – build in small goals (persuade yourself), find a support network

Laura – create new values and aims to live by

John – change your mind and your body will follow

Justine – lead with your powerful spirit

A lot of this sounds familiar to me.  I use the same points in my post on how to start a diet 120 pounds overweight.  None of it is contradicting what I have been doing, which is nice.  The last piece of advice, from Justine, I am not sure how to interpret.  She is quoted as saying that your spirit is powerful and the person in the mirror has all the motivation you need.  I’ll have to think about that one.  The article itself layers its own advice on top of what these guys are saying.  And it’s not the kind of article that has a lot of nuts and bolts.  None of the twelve mentions a food journal.

This article also continues the strange obsession with motivation that I see in all the weight loss literature.  Pretty much every overweight person is motivated to be thin. Trust me, I was very motivated for years.  Motivation was not the problem.  If it was just motivation, I would already be thin.  What  I needed was a whole new way of thinking.

A key difference with the Doctor of Things diet is that I have put a lot of thought into the need to let go of your old life, change your values, listen to your desires, negotiate with yourself, and satisfy yourself, with a goal of controlling your weight.  Your life should improve in its quality and satisfaction.  Losing weight is hard enough, you don’t need to be punishing, depriving, and starving yourself at the same time.  Self knowledge is the key to maintaining control.  

-The Doctor

20190501 Daily report

Every day, I write down what I ate and total calories in my food journal.  My aim is to be in control of my weight.  You can’t control it if you don’t know what’s going on.  The food journal is a lifestyle change, and a high-priority one.  I have committed to doing it for the rest of my life.  I also commit to weighing myself every week.  I am glad I didn’t weight myself today, though.  Yesterday, I had a big meal and followed it up with a lot of cake!  I woke up with no appetite at all.  It took all morning before I was hungry again, and just in time for lunch.  It’s Wednesday, and that means…

I may never get tired of this diet

My daily food intake and calorie count:

Breakfast – tea with half and half.  Not hungry at all.  

  • 80 calories

Lunch – Big Greek Cafe $5 Gyro on Wednesdays!  (600)

  • 600 calories

Dinner – 2 x Costco pepperoni pizza slices (355).

  • 710 calories

Snacking – none

  • 0 calories

Total for the day: 1390 calories (limit 1800)

Observing thin people eat

Today, I had a great opportunity to watch the behavior of thin people around delicious dessert food.  I brought my leftover, homemade birthday cake to my team at work, thinking they would eat it up quickly (and I wouldn’t get snowed under with all the calories!).  I’ve never really watched thin people’s behavior until recently.  All the people I watched today were thin, some very thin.  Those who ate it agreed the cake was very, very tasty.  I had already pre-cut the cake into 300-calorie pieces.  What I saw (in no particular order): 

  1. Fitness guy (he exercises every day) ate a full piece.  Then he went to the gym, as usual.  
  2. Very thin guy cut a piece in half and ate it quite slowly while talking to the group standing around the cake.
  3. Joker guy ate a full piece, reasonably quickly, while talking to the group standing around the cake.
  4. Beard guy politely refused cake, because he had had cake at home over the weekend.
  5. Cello playing girl hesitated to take any cake.  When I told her how many calories per slice (300), she cut a piece in half and ate that, fairly slowly.  She told everyone else who approached the cake how many calories were in a slice (she was meaning to be helpful – she clearly thought that was important information).  
  6. Egyptian guy took a full piece and ate it slowly at his desk. 
  7. Pregnant girl (quite thin) took a half piece and ate it slowly, while talking to the group standing around the cake.  First she asked if the cake was safe for pregnant women.  (I think she just wanted everyone to know she was pregnant – just passed the first trimester.)  

Two other people refused any cake.  There were three half pieces left at the end of the day.  I gave them to the people at my mechanic’s front office (some car work today).  Back when I was gaining weight and out of control, I would have waited until no one was there, then taken a big piece and eaten it in my office.   I wouldn’t have thought about calories.  What a difference changing your mind makes.  As wonderful as the cake was, since I didn’t think I could freeze pieces and eat it slowly, I couldn’t wait to get rid of it. 

It was very interesting to watch the thin people use social approval as a tool to regulate their cake eating.  Once they were told how many calories in the cake, almost everyone opted for a half slice of 150 calories.  Most of them ate it in front of each other and were slow about it.  There’s a lot to learn, there.

-The Doctor

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