My goal is to be hungry every time I sit down at the table for a meal. It’s part of my transformation into a person who is capable of controlling his weight. It’s gotten to be fun, because I’m not hungry until a few minutes before mealtime. Sometimes, I make a mistake, like today. Today, I had to delay eating breakfast for about 40 minutes. I forgot to take a snack, so I was much too hungry by the time I got back home. I made a frozen breakfast sandwich (Jimmy Dean). But it wasn’t enough. I had a potential eating disaster.
My daily food intake and calorie count are:
Breakfast – Jimmy Dean croissantwich (400); Sarris Peanut Butter Meltaway Egg (185); ham (50)
- 635 calories
Lunch – Paska bread (150); ham (150); ice cream (150); chocolate (170)
- 620 calories
Dinner – Ham sandwich (150); yogurt (120).
- 270 calories
Snacking – tea with half and half (80); strawberry shortcake roll (180)
- 260 calories
Total for the day: 1785 calories (limit 1800)
What was this potential eating disaster? Since my goal is to be hungry at the start of every meal, if I delay, I get seriously hungry and also grumpy. (I’m not good at remembering to take snacks.) My body’s reaction is to panic and want to eat lots of things. I have learned that in this situation, even if I eat enough food, my body insists it is in need. Still feeling panicked, I will eat more than I should, in a binge.
I had to be very careful, or else my body would take over and I would eat and then feel out of control and bad about myself. So I immediately had some chocolate and some meat while waiting for my breakfast sandwich to reheat. Then I ate the sandwich. That was a much bigger breakfast than usual, but it wasn’t the end of the problem. I was very aware that my body was still panicked, so I decided to listen carefully. Around 10AM I felt hungry, so I moved up lunch. And I had a big lunch. And I still wasn’t finished! Around 2PM I started feeling some lingering food panic. So I had my dinner then. All I saved for later was my dessert – strawberry shortcake roll. I had that with my family while they had dinner.
I hope you are starting to see how self-knowledge helps. I had a potential binge disaster, which I was able to anticipate and defuse through listening to myself. I didn’t break my calorie limit, though I was in danger all day. Tomorrow will be a new day, and I will pay extra attention! And I will put a few snack packs in my car, if I remember.
-The Doctor