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20201117 Daily report: bumping along

For the last 3-4 weeks I have been having a lot of trouble with my food intake discipline.  I’ve been overeating.  For the first few weeks I tried and tried to force myself back onto the straight and narrow path, but I have given up on that.  It’s not working and force doesn’t seem to work very well.

Instead, I decided to focus on bedtime.  I was getting into a pattern of staying up late, eating too much and not being able to get up the next day.  Then I felt bad about it.  That kept happening.  So, for the last two nights I have made myself quit computing at 9 or 9:30 and go to bed a bit early.  It’s helped, in the sense that I haven’t done late night eating the last two nights.

I can look forward to any pizza this meaty!

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – Premio sausage (230); wrap (90); sauce (20);

  • 340 calories

Lunch – Pizza (570);

  • 570 calories 

Dinner – sausage (300); pretzels and cheese (300);

  • 640 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (160); 

  • 160 calories

Total for the day: 1670 calories (limit 1700)

Forwards

My plan is to keep going this way: early disengagement and bed.  I am also taking steps to reduce some of the stress in my life (taking care of business instead of worrying about it).  I am hopeful that the combination will let me get control of my food intake again.  

Today (the third day of the early bedtime strategy) I ate breakfast early (7AM) and was quite hungry by lunchtime and really ravenous by 4PM.  I didn’t have a small lunch (nearly 600 calories) but still was hungry enough to eat 300 calories before dinner.  

Last night I felt the need to eat something around 8PM (I managed to divert myself to low calorie carrots and pickles) and I was worried that today would be the same.  So far, so good, though.  I did spend part of the afternoon wandering around trying not to think about eating, but it turned out I was legitimately hungry for some reason.  It’s unusual.  But the last few weeks have really thrown me off my game and this will take a little getting used to.  

Bedtime!

-The Doctor

20201107 Weekly weigh-in: exercise

After two terrible diet weeks, it’s time to face up to my situation.  I said yesterday I expected to weigh 215 pounds today.  At my lowest (three weeks ago?  Four?) I was 212.8 pounds.

I weighed 215.2 pounds this morning.  Right where I expected to be.  I have still lost about 110 pounds since I started, which is nice.  It will just take a little longer to get to my target weight.

Late night

I don’t have much to say today.  I had plans to analyze some fitbit data, but I will wait until I am losing again.  Goodnight, and remember: if you want to be in control of your weight, that has to be a top value that you live by and you have to be responsible for it.  No diet plan or food can take that responsibility.  The achievement is yours.

-The Doctor

20201104 Daily report and run

Today, I didn’t exercise – only took 17,000 steps.  Seriously – I didn’t go for a walk or anything, I just took that many steps today.  It’s not unusual.  When I do go for a walk, it’s usually about 4500 steps.  I am just that kind of person, I guess.  It doesn’t prevent me from gaining weight, though.  

Every day, my job is to manage hunger and how I satisfy it.  I do that with a food journal.  I am trying to be responsible for my body’s weight, and that means I can control how much I weigh.  The trick is: I have come up with a lifestyle I like.  I don’t have to use willpower to stay on it, I have found other ways of rewarding myself. 

Saturday Evening Supper, on Wednesday

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – pizza (100); wrap (70); tortilla (330); mayo (25);

  • 525 calories

Lunch – ham (200); Italian bread (120); olive tapenade (30);

  • 350 calories 

Dinner – Saturday evening supper with noodles (200); sausage (300); peppers and onions (25); cheese (100);

  • 625 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80); cookie (50)

  • 130 calories

Total for the day: 1630 calories (limit 1700); Fitbit says I walked 17,548 steps and estimates I burned 3789 calories today.

The job

I can insist on being responsible for how much I weigh.  I don’t do that with willpower, I don’t have that ability.  I have changed my goals for eating, and living, so that I can be successful every day.  Recently I had a stressful couple of weeks and found myself reacting with my old pattern: eating for comfort and stress relief.  However, once I got hold of myself (or things got less stressful, I haven’t decided) I was easily able to start controlling my weight again.  I have had several successful days now (at least, I recorded less than 1700 calories for those days) and don’t feel any deprivation.

The whole system is built around making sure I don’t feel deprived.  I make sure that I am looking forward to each meal and that it will be worth the wait.  It means some extra work – cooking, preparation, shopping, portioning, even cleaning.  But that is a price I am willing to pay.  I enjoy eating measured portions more than I ever enjoyed eating huge ones.  

You see, when your aims and goals and values are set up right, you are able to control your weight using any tools that work for you.  It all serves the goal. 

What is your goal for eating?  Try to answer that honestly and you are halfway there.

-The Doctor

20200802 Daily report, cool edition

As much as I have been enjoying the heat resistance that comes with being a bit thinner, it is always nice when the hot summer weather breaks.  Today was that day.

To control your body’s weight, weight control itself has to be one of your top priorities.  You should be a bit obsessed!  Whatever diet experts tell you about not obsessing is a bit wrong, I think.  You aren’t going to lose a lot of weight and keep it off by tinkering around the edges of what you were doing before.  

Gaining weight actually takes effort.  But you don’t think about it.  Let me explain, after dinner.

Didn't wait to take a picture before starting!

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – Large pancake (120); syrup (60);

  • 180 calories

Lunch – homemade pizza slice (300); 5oz chili (175 ); 1/2 oz tortilla chips (80);

  • 555 calories 

Dinner – 5oz Meatloaf (400); potatoes and carrot (100); brussels sprouts (40);

  • 540 calories

Snacking – Fruit of the Forest pie for dessert (250)

  • 250 calories

Total for the day: 1525 calories (limit 1700)

1700 is still new

Formerly I was limiting myself to 1850 calories per day and losing 2 pounds per week.  Then I suddenly got less exercise (thanks Corona Virus) and I was losing less than a pound per week.  I lowered my calorie intake a bit in response.  Meeting that new stricter limit has not been too difficult so far.  I have been concentrating so hard at work that my eating has gotten very connected to my physical hunger.  That is a good thing.  That is, I am only eating when I am really hungry!

But what did I mean when I was talking about how it takes work to gain weight?  Well, it does.  You have to convince yourself to eat more and that takes some effort.  Physically, eating more than you really, really want to does also take some push.  You have to learn to ignore phyiscal hunger and physical satiety – that feeling of having eaten just enough.  It is there, somewhere.  If you pay attention to the next time you eat you will find you aren’t nearly as hungry after the first few bites.  Sometimes, you don’t really need any more after that.  

Learn to pay attention to hunger.  It can be your best friend in ways you didn’t know.

-The Doctor

Weekend off

Everything is fine, but I need more time than usual for family things.  Enjoy the break and concentrate on keeping your balance.  Self knowledge is the key to it all.    

-The Doctor

20190822 Daily report

My daily task – from now until I decide to stop controlling my weight – is to keep a food journal, aka documenting and controlling my food intake.  I also call it regulating my food intke.  To measure it is to control it.  My other job is to weigh myself.  Right now, I am trying to lose weight.  At some point in the future, my job will be to maintain my weight.  Either way, I have to keep track of my weight and regulate my food intake.  Without those two principles weight control isn’t possible.  It is the price of getting thin and staying thin.  

How I face the day - breakfast

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 6 Costco meatballs (276); hummus (70); whole wheat wrap (110)

  • 460 calories

Lunch – Italian sausage sub (450); coleslaw (50)

  • 500 calories 

Dinner – corn chips (200); 8oz beef tenderloin (485)

  • 685 calories

Snacking – Nestle Li’l Drums vanilla cone (110)

  • 110 calories

Total for the day: 1755 calories (limit 1800)

Live out your values

When values conflict, which ones win?  One of my most conscious values is weight control.  That means when it is time to eat, I should go eat, no matter what else is going on.  When that value is in conflict (something important is going on), it produces tension.  I know I should be stubbornly insisting on my values that I have chosen.  It is weak to let other things come first.  

On the other hand, this specific situation was my fault.  I could easily have make sure I had something to eat at the right time.  I have jerky snacks, there are restaurants nearby.  I didn’t do that.  I can only blame myself, and make sure I have thought about what to do next time – be responsible for myself.  

If the conflict is: eat now by myself, or eat later with the family, my answer is: eat when I am supposed to.  I am in serious deficit and have a serious weight problem.  I have chosen to put addressing that problem first in my life.  I can always sit with my family while they eat, later.  I suppose that is a good way to look at my experience – preparation for doing the right thing later.  It does mean doing the wrong thing and getting mad at yourself, though.  

Now I have eaten and I think my body is not going to be too upset or rebel against my weight control regime.  I feel a little like I want to eat more (not hungry, I am not hungry), but it’s not too bad.  I don’t  always eat steak for dinner, even if dinner was at 7.15PM!   That’s almost two hours late.  

I should also think about how to live out these values under stress.  Stress happens and you can learn to embrace the challenges, or go under and lose control for a while.  It wouldn’t be the end of the world.  I have successfully restarted my weight control program before.  But I would rather advance in my self knowledge and be able to grow in responsibility and ability and resilience.  It’s all about improving myself, even the weight control.

How will you improve yourself?

-The Doctor

20190821 Daily report

I keep a food journal every day – every meal, really.  If I didn’t do it every meal (every time I eat), I might forget things.  That’s no way to control your food intake!  And to control your intake, you have to keep track of what you are eating.  I do it by counting calories and writing it all down.  That is part of my mechanism for achieving weight control.  The other part is getting weighed every week.  That happens Saturdays.  Today is for the food journal.  

The Big Greek Cafe is open!

My food intake and calorie count

Breakfast – 1/2 slice Costco pepperoni pizza (355); 8 ounces New Orleans red beans (250); 2 mini kit kat bars (70)

  • 745 calories

Lunch – Big Greek Cafe Famous $5 Gyro (600)

  • 600 calories 

Dinner – pretzels (300); beef jerky (90)

  • 390 calories

Snacking – tea with half and half (80)

  • 80 calories

Total for the day: 1815 calories (limit 1800)

Abbreviated philosophizing

I had unexpected travel today, so pretzels for dinner and jerky!  I willl have more to say tomorrow.  Sleep well and dream of delicious food!

-The Doctor

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